Hi Lovelies,
I've been dwelling on this topic for a long while, and I decided it's time to be thought out loud (or on the internet I guess...)
As Christians, we're taught to be selfless, to live as Jesus did, to put others before ourselves. I agree with all of this, and I try to live selflessly.
But I think we've taken this idea to an extreme. These past couple of weeks have been rough on most people I've come into contact with, and last weekend I went home wanting to cry for seemingly no reason and while talking with my friend on the drive back, I figured it out.
My soul was tired.
The past few weeks had been spent trying to patch everyone else up, worrying about everyone else's problems and just generally stressing out. I hadn't had any time to myself other than to sleep in weeks and even then I was riddled with other peoples problems.
And I loved it.
I am a counselor by nature, and I absolutely love it when people lay stuff on me, but the past couple weeks was a lot.
It's kind of like coming back from vacation, you loved every minute of it, and wouldn't change a thing, but you're just exhausted.
And then it's time for some self-care, but how does this work in our view of selflessness? While I don't have the answers I do have a couple ideas.
First, make sure your covering your basics.
Ya know, food, water, sleep, an occasional shower. If you haven't eaten in two days and/or are running on two hours of sleep, please get caught up on those things. You will not be helpful to anyone if you put yourself into a sleep deprived or running only on coffee coma. Make sure you have those basics down.
Now, anyone who knows me is probably laughing at me right now because I am the queen of sleeping 5 hours and only eating a meal a day. I really try not to, but sometimes life happens. I get that, but please check yourself and if it's been more than 5 days, you are now your priority.
Second, make sure you're getting your God time.
This one has been really hard for me, because I don't feel helpful when I lock myself in my dorm room with a podcast on, but guys, if we aren't giving ourselves wise counsel everyday how can we expect to pour that out with others? Also, my alone time with God where I just sit there and pray revitalizes me like nothing else. Even if it's fifteen minutes on the drive to school or work, set some time up with God where it's just you two and you're getting yourself fed.
Third, don't feel guilty.
If you're anything like me, you live your life to help others. It's ingrained in me like nothing else and me taking alone time normally results in me doing crazy things like starting a blog in order to try and help someone else. The truth is, when I lock myself in my room to just breathe for a minute, I feel guilty. I feel like I am not fulfilling my purpose as a follower of Jesus if I give myself any time to myself and binge Netflix for a little bit.
Everything in moderation my friend. I, by no means, am giving you permission to become a hermit and binge Netflix every day, but it does have it's place when you're running in burnout mode.
Don't feel guilty about giving yourself a break, you need to take care of you too.
Four, find someone to pour into you.
Call your pastor, an older friend, or a favorite aunt, someone who is removed from your drama situation, and just let them pour into you. Believe me, I know it's awkward to go to someone like that and ask to talk, but it is so necessary. If you're always the one pouring out, no wonder you're running on empty. Let someone refill you.
Now, I'd be lying if I said I've mastered all of these, but I really do try. Burnout is a thing when it comes to helping people, and it's not a fun position to be in, so stay shining, ladies. You can beat the burn out. I have faith in you.
I've been dwelling on this topic for a long while, and I decided it's time to be thought out loud (or on the internet I guess...)
As Christians, we're taught to be selfless, to live as Jesus did, to put others before ourselves. I agree with all of this, and I try to live selflessly.
But I think we've taken this idea to an extreme. These past couple of weeks have been rough on most people I've come into contact with, and last weekend I went home wanting to cry for seemingly no reason and while talking with my friend on the drive back, I figured it out.
My soul was tired.
The past few weeks had been spent trying to patch everyone else up, worrying about everyone else's problems and just generally stressing out. I hadn't had any time to myself other than to sleep in weeks and even then I was riddled with other peoples problems.
And I loved it.
I am a counselor by nature, and I absolutely love it when people lay stuff on me, but the past couple weeks was a lot.
It's kind of like coming back from vacation, you loved every minute of it, and wouldn't change a thing, but you're just exhausted.
And then it's time for some self-care, but how does this work in our view of selflessness? While I don't have the answers I do have a couple ideas.
First, make sure your covering your basics.
Ya know, food, water, sleep, an occasional shower. If you haven't eaten in two days and/or are running on two hours of sleep, please get caught up on those things. You will not be helpful to anyone if you put yourself into a sleep deprived or running only on coffee coma. Make sure you have those basics down.
Now, anyone who knows me is probably laughing at me right now because I am the queen of sleeping 5 hours and only eating a meal a day. I really try not to, but sometimes life happens. I get that, but please check yourself and if it's been more than 5 days, you are now your priority.
Second, make sure you're getting your God time.
This one has been really hard for me, because I don't feel helpful when I lock myself in my dorm room with a podcast on, but guys, if we aren't giving ourselves wise counsel everyday how can we expect to pour that out with others? Also, my alone time with God where I just sit there and pray revitalizes me like nothing else. Even if it's fifteen minutes on the drive to school or work, set some time up with God where it's just you two and you're getting yourself fed.
Third, don't feel guilty.
If you're anything like me, you live your life to help others. It's ingrained in me like nothing else and me taking alone time normally results in me doing crazy things like starting a blog in order to try and help someone else. The truth is, when I lock myself in my room to just breathe for a minute, I feel guilty. I feel like I am not fulfilling my purpose as a follower of Jesus if I give myself any time to myself and binge Netflix for a little bit.
Everything in moderation my friend. I, by no means, am giving you permission to become a hermit and binge Netflix every day, but it does have it's place when you're running in burnout mode.
Don't feel guilty about giving yourself a break, you need to take care of you too.
Four, find someone to pour into you.
Call your pastor, an older friend, or a favorite aunt, someone who is removed from your drama situation, and just let them pour into you. Believe me, I know it's awkward to go to someone like that and ask to talk, but it is so necessary. If you're always the one pouring out, no wonder you're running on empty. Let someone refill you.
Now, I'd be lying if I said I've mastered all of these, but I really do try. Burnout is a thing when it comes to helping people, and it's not a fun position to be in, so stay shining, ladies. You can beat the burn out. I have faith in you.
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